(no subject)
Sep. 21st, 2007 09:59 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tamara_russoI got an sms from Helena yesterday - a class meeting (my high school class) on the 29th.
My first response was, of course, hell, I'm definitely not going to go. The problem is, it bothers me. I don't know why it bothers me, and that bothers me as well...
The thing is, I hated most of the kids in my class (they made sure I'll have miserable teen years on every chance they got), and most chances are Efrat will be there as well. I told Mel and Helena it would be funny to take Mel with me and introduce her as my girlfriend (sure to make a few people gap), and I'm pondering.
I really have no desire to see all of those people, and that should be my biggest reason not to go.
I hate it so much that they still affect my life, this thing came out of the fucking blue.
On the other hand, I stopped caring what they're thinking about me a long time ago, and I have a life now - friends, people I love who don't put me down every day, who don't make me cry.
I'm not going to go, I know I won't. It just made me look at the past, and I don't like what I see. Never did.
But why can't I be free of them?
My first response was, of course, hell, I'm definitely not going to go. The problem is, it bothers me. I don't know why it bothers me, and that bothers me as well...
The thing is, I hated most of the kids in my class (they made sure I'll have miserable teen years on every chance they got), and most chances are Efrat will be there as well. I told Mel and Helena it would be funny to take Mel with me and introduce her as my girlfriend (sure to make a few people gap), and I'm pondering.
I really have no desire to see all of those people, and that should be my biggest reason not to go.
I hate it so much that they still affect my life, this thing came out of the fucking blue.
On the other hand, I stopped caring what they're thinking about me a long time ago, and I have a life now - friends, people I love who don't put me down every day, who don't make me cry.
I'm not going to go, I know I won't. It just made me look at the past, and I don't like what I see. Never did.
But why can't I be free of them?
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(no subject)
Date: 2007-09-21 09:59 am (UTC)במקרה שלך אולי הייתי דווקא הולכת ושוב כדי להראות להם דווקא, בסוף תגלי שהחתיכה של הכיתה נשואה עם שני ילדים ואני מקווה שהמפגש עם אפרת לא יהיה כזה נוראי ואת לא מחויבת לדבר איתה בכל מקרה.
(מצטערת על העברית, אין לי כוח להתנסח באנגלית עכשיו).
(no subject)
Date: 2007-09-21 11:16 am (UTC)Besides - I already know that the class babe was married, had a baby and got divorced... Tee-hee. My curse is working well...
(no subject)
Date: 2007-09-21 12:13 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-09-21 01:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-09-22 01:27 pm (UTC)בחורה יפיפייה, בעלת תואר ראשון שמתחילה עוד תואר ראשון כי היא יכולה. גרה בבית של ההורים כי היא יכולה ויש לה את היחסים המספיק טובים עם ההורים בשביל לברוח. בחורה חכמה, אינטליגנטית, מדהימה ובעיקר מישהי שבדרך הנכונה להצלחה.
אבל אם את לא מרגישה שאת רוצה ללכת אז פשוט אל תלכי ושימי *** אחד גדול על כולם.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-09-24 12:08 pm (UTC)תודה על העידוד... :)
בכל מקרה אני לא אלך, מכל הסיבות שכבר ציינתי, ובהחלט אשים זין על כולם (ואת יכולה לרשום את המילה המפורשת...), פשוט נמאס לי שזה עדיין חודר לי לחיים.