That was unpleasant

SH: "How was riding the train without any soldiers? Did you have a place to sit?"
Me: "I always have a place to sit."
SH: "Sure, they see an old pregnant (!!!) woman, they'll give her a sit"
Me: [stunned silence]
SH: [pointing at me]
Me: "Wow. That was one of the most insulting things anyone has ever said to me in the past few years."
SH: "No offense"
Me: "..."

Yes. That was unpleasant.

Oh, IZ.

[IZ and I go down to the storage room to find a part]
MX (the storage area guy): [gives me the wicked eye]
Me: "I'm not the one messing your order!" [pointing at IZ]

*~*
We walk into another room of the storage area and there's a smell of toast burning.
IZ: "My! What is this horrible smell?!?!? Is it this toast? Abomination, I tell you, abomination!!! [פיגולים]
Me: [laughing so hard I can't straighten my face]

*~*

It took me two trials climbing one of the stairs, I was laughing so hard.